Time to make a more personal reflection of how these times
are affecting me. I count myself amongst the statistically more vulnerable, I
am over 60 and my cardio vascular health could be better.
It is my mental health which is suffering most though. I have always been anxious and the uncertainty of these times does not improve that one little bit, "I expect you to die Mr Arnold", the invisible enemy is saying to me like some kind of Goldfinger to my James Bond. There is only so much I can control, but living as I do in a block of flats, there is only so much social distancing you can do. To put out my rubbish, or as was the case the other day to accept a delivery, I have to come out of my door and go down a landing and through landings shared by others, not all of whom have been isolating to the degree which I have. Yesterday a delivery driver would not bring the delivery up my stairs, he left it at the bottom, so I had to come out and bring it all the way up a few carrier bags at a time. Well I was within less than two of those precious meters of two neighbours during that process, hey one of them even helped himself to a bottle of my precious Henry Weston’s from my delivery. I let him have it (the bottle that is) because you have to keep friendly with your neighbours even if sometimes they annoy the pants off you with noise from the neighbouring flats.
I cannot say for certain I don’t have this virus, I have symptoms of a sort but not really fitting the typical, so I just don’t know. Is it allergy, is it mild virus, or maybe both? This is the thing, if there were a test I would be satisfied with either result, positive or negative, because at least I would know.
I have signed up for a research project, in the States as it happens monitoring mental health through this pandemic. I thought it would be a good idea, it could even be therapeutic answering questions about how I feel, that is of course if I endure through to the sunlit uplands that await on the other side.
The other evening, I got drunk, I went live on Facebook, and had a good old shouting rant. I have not looked back to see what all that was about as I will probably embarrass myself if I do. That is Facebook for you, at least I had my clothes on this time.
It is my mental health which is suffering most though. I have always been anxious and the uncertainty of these times does not improve that one little bit, "I expect you to die Mr Arnold", the invisible enemy is saying to me like some kind of Goldfinger to my James Bond. There is only so much I can control, but living as I do in a block of flats, there is only so much social distancing you can do. To put out my rubbish, or as was the case the other day to accept a delivery, I have to come out of my door and go down a landing and through landings shared by others, not all of whom have been isolating to the degree which I have. Yesterday a delivery driver would not bring the delivery up my stairs, he left it at the bottom, so I had to come out and bring it all the way up a few carrier bags at a time. Well I was within less than two of those precious meters of two neighbours during that process, hey one of them even helped himself to a bottle of my precious Henry Weston’s from my delivery. I let him have it (the bottle that is) because you have to keep friendly with your neighbours even if sometimes they annoy the pants off you with noise from the neighbouring flats.
I cannot say for certain I don’t have this virus, I have symptoms of a sort but not really fitting the typical, so I just don’t know. Is it allergy, is it mild virus, or maybe both? This is the thing, if there were a test I would be satisfied with either result, positive or negative, because at least I would know.
I have signed up for a research project, in the States as it happens monitoring mental health through this pandemic. I thought it would be a good idea, it could even be therapeutic answering questions about how I feel, that is of course if I endure through to the sunlit uplands that await on the other side.
The other evening, I got drunk, I went live on Facebook, and had a good old shouting rant. I have not looked back to see what all that was about as I will probably embarrass myself if I do. That is Facebook for you, at least I had my clothes on this time.
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